Inside Buy More
Tips from Big Mike
Emmett's Art of Buy War
February 18, 2009 5:57 PM
All is fair in love and Buy War. I was not given power -- I took it. It was not by accident that I came in control of the Burbank Buy More. I have been hard at work, my friends. To prepare, I have been reading an ancient Chinese text, "The Art of War." With the master's teachings in hand, I was able to conquer the battlefield of the Buy More:
"He will win who knows when not to fight."
I have been planning my coup for months, a deadly cobra, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. I snatched the store from Big Michael's sugarcoated fingers. The man was never fit to rule anyway.
"All warfare is based on deception."
I love the smell of manipulation in the morning. Your enemies cannot defend themselves if they have no idea that they are under siege. I used the loathsome Morgan Grimes as my pawn. Together, we convinced the corporate evaluator that I was man for the job. Meanwhile as Big Michael concerned himself with bait, tackle and baked goods, I was handed the keys to the city.
Might makes right!
----Manager Milbarge
Message Board
- September Equinox Inventory
- For those of you at BM's other than Burbank, as you know, September is inventory. Bartowski (that SOB) has somehow wangled a vacation MONTH from management. Grimes is gone too, as are Jeff, Lester, Ana and the idiot-savant John Casey. And that leaves ME to do ALL the inventory by myself. Well and myself and Skippy! Like that's a help. The guy put the bar card reader to his face and had to go to the tatoo removal to get the barcode imprint off his cheek. Duh!!!
Now I know you all will think I'm crazy to ask, but please come help me finish inventory. I had to start all this on September 2nd, the day after Labor Day. Which, I worked because it was Bartowski's ... well ... I did agree to let Chuck have that day as he had covered for me last Halloween.
I cannot get Bartowski or Grimey to cover for you this time, but I am able to issue you a BuyMore Phonica invite. That will allow you to make free phone call around the U.S. -- While I'm thinking of it, if a psychic could "sense" the internet, would that make him an ESP ISP? I cannot possibly finish the rest. I've done the TV & Audio, Cellphone, Home Appliances, and Computers. But there is no way I'm finishing all the Software, DVDs and Music by Sept. 25. So, I (and I'm begging here), stop by. The best I can offer is a slice of pizza and a frozen yogurt from the Orange Orange. I will have the house PA with some music, so bring a friend (opposite sex) and some beer. I could put on some bootlegged Jeffster for the Metal Heads.
I got Sarah from the Orange Orange to be the D.J. at least for part of the evening. We will start at normal store closing hours, 9pm and got 'till dawn. Bring your barcode guns.
Q@$ A@#R this job !!!!!!!!!
... more - Inside BuyMore
- This is an invite to all who want some Chuck stuff.
I have a weblog ('blog)
Inside Buy More Blog
where you can find blank signed employee evaluations (Emmett Milbarge's signature), customer service cards, BuyMore Bucks and Ana Wu's employee evaluation.
It's all free. Nothing asked in return, except that you are a Chuck fan.
... more - Employee Health care and matching 401k
- Here at the Buy More we are now offering Employee Profit sharing as well as heath benifits and Matching 401k. Just reffer to the Buy More web sight and Click on the tab for employees.
Thanks
Craig
Corprate office
... more - Melvin Grimes looking a little pale
- Hey! Fellow 'Gnurders, I was on a day shift last week, when Chuck & the gang had returned from the seminar in San Diego. I'm sure you know that they were taken there to help sell electronics & stuff, despite the rumour that they were all at the Comic-Con 2009 Convention. How that rumour got started I'll never know. So Grimey was in the break room, and if you can recall how unnatural the Terminator's skin looked in T-3, well ... that's exactly how Grimes skin looked. And what's weirder, he was reading a book titled: Neural Networks. Come on -Grimes reading?
In case you don't believe me, I've got a cam-phone pix of the book's cover, attached.... more - My pix of the Chuck cast from San Diego Comic Con
- Here are some pix that we took during SDCC this year. We even got to meet the cast from Chuck and got a nice autographed poster and some great pictures. Enjoy!
Our little Buy More Crew
Mr. Casey himself Adam Baldwin
Chuck and Morgan (Zach and Josh) posing with us...yes!!
Yvonne graciously smiling for the camera
Jeff and Big Mike complimenting my outfit
Lester signing our posters
Ellie and Cpt. Awesome with my wifey
More pix from around the Con here...
Comic Con 2009... more
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